The Waitress is Watching
Evidently, this little freestanding building was the place Nashville’s best comfort food called home. Tucked away in a residential area with limited and awkward parking, my husband Chris and I decided, after several recommendations from friends, to explore what this cozy little cafĂ© had to offer. We moved to Nashville at the end of June, and finding delectable hole-in-the-wall restaurants is one of our favorite hobbies.
A waitress with frizzy blonde hair appeared. She seemed older than her fifty years, with deep wrinkles and a posture of a woman who has spent most of her life carrying food to hungry customers. Her southern accent was thick as she took our order. When she returned with our rolls and butter, she grinned as she asked us a question that caught us completely off guard.
“Do y’all mind if I ask y’all how long y’all’ve been married?”
We looked at each other a little surprised, but I turned and answered her.
“We just passed our five year anniversary a few days ago.”
Her smile got bigger as she told us she assumed we were newlyweds. “It’s just the way y’all look at each other and act. I just thought you hadn’t been married very long. You seem so in love.”
Surprised, we thanked her as she turned to wait on another customer.
“That was weird,” I told Chris. “But I guess that’s a good thing, huh?”
He agreed, and we returned to our baked squash and fried okra.
I couldn’t help but think more about what the waitress asked us about. Now, I’m certainly not one to claim I have a perfect marriage. Chris and I have had our fair share of issues and problems and fights. We are definitely past that newlywed phase and our guards are down, tempting us to take each other for granted and let our selfish nature win over serving each other.
The thing that struck me most was the unexpectedness of the conversation. Here we were, in a small unassuming restaurant, simply having dinner.
But someone was watching.
Over the last couple of months, I’ve been meditating on a familiar verse.
The apostle Paul wrote to Timothy in 1 Timothy 4:12,
“Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity.”
As leaders in ministry, especially those of us who are younger, it’s easy to feel like the influence we have isn’t as powerful as someone who has a fancy title, a wider audience, or even a larger paycheck. Especially when your position is considered low in the ministry food chain, you often wonder what kind of impact you’re having.
Jesus had every right in the world to demand honor and fame in his ministry. Yet, Philippians 2 tells us that he “did not consider equality with God something to be grasped, but made himself nothing.”
We desperately want to be affirmed and encouraged in our attempts for God. But we have to remember – it’s not about us. It’s not about the impact our ministry can have or our reputation as a leader or seeing our name on all the right blogrolls.
The spotlight is something our human nature craves. And regardless of if our name is ever in lights, someone is always watching.
It’s your supervisor. Your pastor. Your spouse. Your child. Your volunteer team. Your church members. The waitress at the restaurant.
You are setting an example, whether you know it or not.
Oswald Chambers wrote,
“The people who influence us the most are not those who detain us with their continual talk, but those who live their lives like the stars in the sky and "the lilies of the field"— simply and unaffectedly. Those are the lives that mold and shape us.
If you want to be of use to God, maintain the proper relationship with Jesus Christ by staying focused on Him, and He will make use of you every minute you live— yet you will be unaware, on the conscious level of your life, that you are being used of Him.”
It’s not about us. It’s about Him…and how we can reflect His love and truth to the world around us. It’s about living in His grace and extending it to others. We have to constantly remain in communion with Christ. Then and only then will the pure, unadulterated love of God show through us.
And we won’t even realize it.
5 comments:
i just wanted to say thanks for posting the article! i'm glad our comfort food adventures have been able to mean something more than calories. :-)
Awesome story Kim!
I like the part where it doesn't matter how young you are when you are serving...just that you are serving and making a difference for someone. I can really tell a difference in myself when I start to look at the recognition in others at church and feel that jealousy. I have to be on constant guard with myself to remind me that it's not about the glory for me...it's that I'm doing something to change a child's life or help someone at church. It may not be a big deal to me, but it may to someone else.
And someone is always watching. Sunday while I was drying out our tent, the lady camping next to us came over to talk to me. She said how impressed she was by all the kids' behavior during the weekend. She asked if we were all family camping together, but I told her we were a Sunday school class doing this for the first time. Dave and I said when we signed up for camping we would be doing it because we knew the kids would enjoy it. I was definitely a bright spot in our weekend to have a stranger remind us that the weekend wasn't about us and our own preferences...but it was that our kids would have a good time and that it was a time for us to spend as a family.
Thanks for sharing the story...I'll be sure to check out her website to read more.
love ya,
Sarah
You find the most unique material and share it so well. We will have to buy this book like the SHACK and talk about how it affected us.
If a person in genuine others notice.
Love the blog.
mom
Kim I to want to find her book. I'm with Sarah, "Awesome story" And means so much. So true somone is always watching how we react to the difficulties that come our way. So I say May God help my.walk,and my talk. You do fine the neatest things to write about. Love you,Grandma
Awesome story! It is so true that not matter where we are or what we may be doing, someone is always watching us. God can us each of us to reach someone in need. We just need to let our love shine through! I will look for this new book and appreciate you sharing one of her stories!
Love ya,
Marsha
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