Tip...

So my topic for tonight will not be as controversial or as serious as the past few. But I am wanting to know what you think...
This weekend we went to Red Lobster with my family and as we have said in the past...when you take my mom...expect bad service, cold food or something wrong with your food. So this time we were blessed with somewhat bad food but mostly bad service. It all started early in the service when I said to the waitress when she asked for our drink order... I said..."First...we are going to need more napkins and then I will take a Diet and my kids will take Shirley T's" But before you go thinking I serve my kids some alcoholic beverage you should know that they have this really cool drink (with free refills) that a Shirley T is sprite and cherry syrup. So the drinks came...no napkins. If you have kids you know why I asked for napkins because as soon as you don't one of your "angels" will spill one of the drinks or something will need wiped up. So I asked again. Now in my mind I am thinking she probably just forgot the first time because we had 12 people in our group. So off she went to get our salads or rolls or something...maybe she was on a smoke break...who knows. Anyway when she came back...no napkins. This time...I said..."I REALLY need those napkins". I raise my tone a bit...and off she went. We didn't see her or our food for some time...and when she brought it...NO NAPKINS. This time I said...."I want those napkins that I asked for earlier!" This time she brought them but it was after we had eaten most of our food and we were all waiting on Wayne to finish his 12th order of the all you can eat shrimp scampi. (this eating habit will be discussed in a later post) So the tip I would have given her was more like...find a new job....don't leave home without an umbrella or don't dance naked in glass houses. She did get a tip (5%) but think of the tip she would have gotten had she just brought me my napkins.
Besides this annoying experience at Red Lobster, I really enjoyed having my brother here from Florida. It seems like only a month since I saw him last (actually it was). We spent some time at my dads and a majority of the time at grandpa and grandma's. You can tell that the grandparents had a little bit of an overload because they took off for Florida this morning. I also want to thank my family for showing up to see me sing in the church choir...it meant a lot to me. Also I want to say a special thanks to Kristena for sparking my interest in the world of couponing. I can't wait to get started. You should know though that our family is not very good at finishing things...we have all started diets...but you can't tell.

My Job or someone else's

Where is the line? Where is the line between being critical of someone and pointing out things that everyone has been thinking and not saying so that the person can better themselves? I struggle with this line. For instance, do you tell someone late in the day that they have a pair of underwear sticking out of the bottom of their pant leg when it is obvious that they have had them stuck there all day and it didn't seem to be something that anyone else has decided to share with them or do you let them discover them later. I always tell Wayne that a true friend will tell me if I am doing something wrong or wearing something inappropriate or I have something stuck somewhere it is not supposed to be. A true friend will tell you that you have a pepper grain as big as your front tooth sticking between your teeth or that your zipper has found its way down or that when you bend over everyone can see what kind of underwear you are wearing or they can see the tattoo that you have been hiding from everyone. That is a true friend. I guess the line that I struggle with is the one of more personal issues...like here is a good example. My husband...he stands a bit close to people when he talks...you know the 3 foot rule. Well my dear sweet husband feels the need, along with his whole family, to stand so that you feel like any minute they are going to hug you or kiss you. You try to back away but they inch closer...SO annoying. I have mentioned to him that it is annoying and he gets mad that I am being critical. Another thing....he talks alot... Anyone who has met him knows this...I think he knows it...but when I point it out...I am being mean. Now I know that everyone talks about it to other people but no one tells him...I feel like if I tell him I will save him from being ridiculed by his peers. Now don't feel like you have just stepped into a fight between him and I, we are not fighting about this and I have told him what I am blogging about...I was just wondering what everyone else was thinking about this line. So that is it for now...a little thing I have been questioning as I strive to be a better wife and a better friend...BY the way...if it is the job of a friend to tell you those things then WATCH OUT...I have a few friends that I have been wanting to be critic...I mean help out.

Looking ahead...

Tonight I decided to go watch a band that I used to go every weekend and hear play at the local bars. So as I stepped into the bar tonight I went in with a different purpose than before. This time I wasn't there to party but I was there to get to know them and for them to get to know me. I was in a bible study recently and a gentleman that comes said we need to get to know the non-christians...not just preach to them or hang a door hanger on their door to get them to come. I made the decision to go tonight after the lead singer of the band and I were talking earlier in the week and I was telling her that I had turned my life around and that I was now attending church with my family. She expressed to me that her and her husband (who happens to be the bass player) have been really searching lately for the "more" in life. It was a much different experience tonight then when I used to go. At one point this guy sat down and started cursing and the lady sitting next to me said..."watch your language, this lady goes to church" What a weird feeling. I wanted them to be themselves but I appreciated how quickly he changed what he was saying and how he was saying it. They seemed relaxed and I didn't feel any pressure to join them in drinking and when the drink order came to me and I ordered a Mt. Dew, no one said a word. Maybe this is the way to reach them...I don't know but I felt like I made a good decision in going because now they know that I love them despite their habits and despite their way of life and best of all they know that the change in me is because I go to church now and that I love God. As I drove away I turned on a the CD that I got for our choir from church and skipped ahead to the song "Your Grace Still Amazes Me".

My faithful Father, enduring Friend
Your tender mercy’s like a river with no end
It overwhelms me, covers my sin
Each time I come into Your presence
I stand in wonder once again

CHORUS:
Your grace still amazes me
Your love is still a mystery
Each day I fall on my knees
Your grace still amazes me
‘Cause Your grace still amazes me

Oh, patient Saviour, You make me whole
You are the Author and the Healer of my soul
What can I give You, Lord, what can I say
I know there’s no way to repay You
Only to offer You my praise

It’s deeper, it’s wider
It’s stronger, it’s higher
It’s deeper it’s wider
It’s stronger, it’s higher
than anything my eyes can see

Quick Update...

So...where do I start? My dad is losing his hair. I guess I wasn't prepared for it. It made this whole thing real. I told my mom that when I went to hug him goodbye today I had about 20 or 30 strands of his hair stuck to my face. Joshua went with me and I had to brush him off after we got in the car. I thought that the hair only fell out after chemo but I guess the radiation that they did on his head must have been pretty strong. I was worried about if he was still talking to me after our associate pastor went and visited with him on Sunday but he didn't seem to mind...what a relief. Today I gave him the photo book that I have been making for him. It turned out really nice and he cried a lot while looking at it. I had an awful time looking at him today because he looks so different...with his hair falling out, his face is looking swollen and his eyes have dark circles. He still has a little sense of humor...when I asked when he noticed his hair falling out, he said...One day I got up and my hair didn't and then he laughed. He said that he is taking off one more week without any treatment because he is so weak. He isn't sure he wants to even have anymore treatment because yesterday the doctor said that the treatment isn't going to make him better...just slow down the getting worse part. I think he was still holding out hope that this would all cure itself. On other note...he is married again. This is news that I have known for awhile but we weren't allowed to share until he had told each of us. Now that we all know...I can share with the blog world. He has been with the same woman for 20 years, hard to imagine. I used to refer to her as "the thing" because she wasn't really a girlfriend and there is no common law wife anymore, so I didn't know what to call her. Plus she is only a couple of years older than my brother John so it was always a little weird for all of us. I didn't feel like I could call her the significant other because that would sound like he was living with a man and I didn't want to just refer to her as my half-brother's mom so...
But now that he is sick and she had the opportunity to walk away with no legal reason to stay...she opted to stay. Kudos to her. Now she is my step-mom...That sounds weird but it was a long time coming and I am glad for him and her.
So much for keeping this quick.
On another note...we are having a garage sale this week at my mom's to get rid of all of the things that she has accumlated in the last couple of years and around our family we keep anything that just can't be thrown away...it is too good...or someone will get good use out of this or so and so gave this to me. I personally don't have that problem. I like to give it away so I can see if I get it back and that has happened.
We are also having a family reunion. It all started when my grandma's sister decided to come visit from Michigan (2)...and her brother decided to come and see them, up to 4 now...then his daughter decided to come who invited her other siblings to come (7 or 8 more)...then the sister in Michigan decided to invite her daughter (plus 1), then my cousins who live in town decided to have everyone over to their house (add 4 more) and then you add the mother of the cousin who is also the sister-in-law and her daughters (2 or 3 more)...THEN...the other widowed sister-in-law caught wind of this growing reunion and is bring her daughter, daughter's husband and their son (3)....This is not even including the 2 people that my aunt from Michigan came to visit in the first place...my grandparents. And lets not forget me and my family and my mom. So...I think that is it...29...but it could be more...I am sure it will continue to grow after all it is only Wednesday. Luck for my cousin she has this new dining room that seats 15 so we will only have to double up on the seats.

It has been awhile...

I know...it has been awhile since you have heard from me. I just couldn't think of anything to blog about. I thought about blogging about how blessed I was...but that was taken, I thought about telling you how my blog life and real life have collided, but it was taken. I was going to share how my mom sold her house but I didn't want to steal her moment or her topic for blogging. I was going to tell you how exciting it is to have another girl in the family but my brother already blogged about that...I was going to post picture of how cute my kids are (AND THEY ARE) but my cousin trumped that idea by putting her 5 year old daughter's pictures online and she is way too cute in her ballerina outfit to compete with right now since my kids have nothing to show but their battle scars. I would also blog about how grateful I am again of my friends but I didn't want to start WWII again and plus my friend Sarah did that topic this week. SO now what...ramble on and on and hope that you all are just happy that I blogged in the first place and that you now have something new to read. Pretty much...

But what I really should be blogging about is what a great sermon we had today and how much I am enjoying my new bible study on Thursdays or how much I enjoy listening to other point of view in my Sunday school class. Shouldn't my focus everyday be first on what a great God that we have. That it really doesn't matter what denomination you are or what church you do or you don't attend but that YOU know that you are under the umbrella of grace...that no matter what the storm, we are protected by our God. The pastor was speaking about being so involved in the church that we are producing "fruit" (new followers of Christ). We have so many churches that are growing in numbers but they can't really tell you how many people were saved last year but they know that they had 800 for one service. He said that each church has its core of believers, people who are completely "sold out" to Christ and their "denomination" is not a factor. Then there is a larger circle of workers in the church who believe in the church/denomination and what they are doing and they know the rules and the follow the rules and they believe in the general belief of Christ. Then there is an outer circle of people in a church that simply come to church so that they can say that they go. They are coming but they are not connected, they don't volunteer for anything, they don't get involved...they just come. Christianity is not based on some creed but on Life and Giving Life. Being a servant and witnessing to potential servants of Christ. If they reject us...it is OK...at least we tried. If they accept...great...chalk one up for God. But at least do something. Matthew 13:2-9 gives the parable of the sower and how he planted his seed in many different soils...some in a path, some in the rocks, some in the thorns and some in the good soil...in Matthew 13:18-23 it breaks it down...

18"Listen then to what the parable of the sower means: 19When anyone hears the message about the kingdom and does not understand it, the evil one comes and snatches away what was sown in his heart. This is the seed sown along the path. 20The one who received the seed that fell on rocky places is the man who hears the word and at once receives it with joy. 21But since he has no root, he lasts only a short time. When trouble or persecution comes because of the word, he quickly falls away. 22The one who received the seed that fell among the thorns is the man who hears the word, but the worries of this life and the deceitfulness of wealth choke it, making it unfruitful. 23But the one who received the seed that fell on good soil is the man who hears the word and understands it. He produces a crop, yielding a hundred, sixty or thirty times what was sown."

“I am only one, but I am one. I can't do everything, but I can do something. The something I ought to do, I can do. And by the grace of God, I will.”

Edward Everett Hale quotes (American Clergyman and Writer, 1822-1909)